10/12/04 by oldestgenxer

Okay kids, I was wondering how to post all the goings-on that I have experienced in the last few weeks, like should I post it in reverse order of the most important, so that at the end, the climax? Innuendo aside, Im not that organized. Likewise to do it in chronological order, because I--- I forget why. So I will take the appropriate choice, which is to ramble incoherently until I get done. Any thing resembling an order is only a coincidence.

So, we closed on the house, which was 2 hours of nothing but signing papers. Most of it seemed legit, but if I wake up on ice in a bathtub with a long row of stitches on my back, I guess I'll know that I donated a lung. But in the time leading up to the close was all of the coordination, and arranging to turn things on, and stuff like that. Hey, we have cable now, because we are too far away for an antenna, which was our previous mode. We had 6 and sometimes 7 channels of broadcast glory! Now we hav about 50+ channels (just the very basic, because I am cheap) And now I do nothing but change channels. I may just put tape on the channel up button. I need a tv guide, stat.
So then we began our adventure in moving. Actually, that began a month or so ago, when we started putting our shit in storage. we filled up a 10x20 storage, and our house was still full of all kinds of crap. This was a complete mystery to me how this was possible until I realized that our house was the convergence of a 4-dimensional space/time flux, so we had extra space. For free.
But then we began to move our actual STUFF, in my truck and borrowed trailer, and our van. It should all go smoothly, but wait! There was an auction at the high school where they were selling surplus stuff. I had to go; I was drawn to it like a bee to a flower, or a fly to shit, or a man to a hardware store. When we closed on the house, they had made a mistake calculating the interest, so we got a check back, so I had some cash.
Mistake.
First on the auction block was the computer stuff. The first piles of stuff werent that interesting, but I picked up a few things, like a switch and some other hardware. Then they turned to the skids of computers. Macs, Lots of them. I am so sorry, Keri, but I couldn't see the need for a Mac. Plus these looked old. There were hardly any takers. One guy bought about 23 of them for 2 bucks apiece.
They turned to the pcs, which is my field, and I had already perused them. I ---I bought 15 computers. Four of them were 20 bucks apiece, included a monitor and keyboard, and almost as an after thought, I bought 2 more skids, which was 11 of them for 7.50 apiece. I wasn't done. I bought six or 9 printers (to be honest, I dont know how many) about 4 of them line feed like we use at work, a laser printer, a scanner, and some other ones.
Nope, not done yet. I bought a big-ass honking Xerox machine for 40 dollars.

My wife is a real trooper, seriously. Like I expected she was upset at first, but got over it. But as I filled up the back of my truck AND the entire trailer with all of this stuff, I had serious doubts as to my sanity. I still do.
What I really wanted was a school bus, but they didnt have any short ones. What would I do with a LONG bus? That would be ridiculous. So one of the first things we moved into our new house, into the garage, was a large pile of computers. I have high hopes of being able to string them together to form a super computer, and from there, take over the world. But then we continued to move our shit, and we are almost done. I still have all of my tools at the old house, because I need to fix it up, because we are keeping it, and renting it out. After we had cable installed, I asked the dude about the cable internet dealy. He said not until the end of the year, maybe. "Oh really? Cause I heard October." "Doubt it..." So I caved and called the phone company to find out aobut the DSL. They said it was fast, but Im thinkin, I live on the the NW corner of the middle of fuckin nowhere, so how fast can it be? Our old DSL in suburbia was apparantly on the edge of the service area, because we got download of about 250k. At first it SEEMED fast, because we came from dial-up, but I was hoping my porn would load faster.
Anyway, I get it here, install the thingy, and it is rocket fast! It is virgin-on-prom-night fast! Go to toast.net, and they have some free speed tests you can perform. I am at 1.6 MB download!!! Fucking aye, baby!

Okay, but the thing is, in the meantime, the restaraunt deal may have fallen through. My end was good, but it was contingent on my boss buying this other restaraunt, and as they got closer to the deal, things seemed fishy, and there are some legal things going on with it. They may not be able to buy it at all, or if they do, it could be 6 months or three years down the road. In the meantime I still have to pay a fuckin lawyer 500 dollars for taking care of my business incorporation. Merry Christmas!